Club Fantasy

307 W. 4th Street, Downtown LA
Exit 110 N at 4th/3rd exit, left on fork, right on fork, merge to W. 4th.
(213) 620-9572
Sun - Sat: 4pm - 2am
Cover: $5 (VISA, MC, ATM)
Dance fee: $27/hr, one hour minimum on credit/ATM cards
Food: Snack bar w/light snacks, candy, soft drinks, etc.
Security parking: $4.00 after 4:00 PM, free after 8:00 PM. If you dance for at least an hour, they will refund half the parking fee. Be sure to show them your parking stub before leaving the club.
Other: Video games, and no pool tables.
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Located across the street from the Bunker Hill project, it has a somewhat better locale than most of the downtown clubs. This is actually a fairly clean and well-maintained club by downtown standards, and the clientele as well as the girls are a cut above most clubs. The quality of the girls used to be second only to Starlight, but now I’d say they have the best looking girls. Most are 7's and up, there are several 8's, and a few 9's. There are more Anglos, too, although probably better than 50% are Latinas. Some of the girls even wear long gowns or pants (yawn). You'll just have to go by instinct in picking a girl.  

The girls get their pick of four shifts to work: 4-10, 6-12, 8-12 (this explains why there are often more cards in the rack than there are girls after 12 AM), and 8-2. They have to be there within a half-hour after the shift starting time or they don’t get paid for their minutes.  Weekends are slow before 8:00, especially before 6:30. During the week there may be anywhere from 8 to 12 girls by 4:30, and up to maybe 25 by 6:30. The TV room is now closed until 8:00 PM and has been since last year.  

You can tell how many girls are working by counting the cards in the rack behind the clock stand. A colored card means the girl is there and not clocked in. A white card in front of the colored card means she’s there and clocked in with a customer.  

Security makes regular sweeps about every half-hour. In between their sweeps the young Latino guy who works behind the counter will come by at least once, which I find very annoying. If they feel the surveillance isn’t frequent enough I don’t understand why they don’t just have security shorten the intervals between sweeps.  

They also turned up the lighting in the TV room, although the brightness seems to vary from day to day and week to week. You've got to watch out for not only security, but also the waitresses as well. They have been instructed to report any improprieties they see to management. Reportedly the girls are now being required to sign some sort of "probation notice" on the first offense, with the understanding they'll be fired if caught again.  

There are no cameras. Rumor has it that this club will be the next to go. The City has big plans for the Pershing Square area, just one block away, and the club is supposedly in the redevelopment area.

Club Starlight

1224 S. Broadway, Downtown LA
Exit 10 Fwy at Grand, merge to W. 18th, left on S. Broadway
(213) 747-7653
Sun - Sat: 7pm? - 2am
Cover: $5 (VISA, MC, ATM)
Food: Unknown, they do serve soft drinks, so they probably have a snack bar
Dance fee: $28/hr
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I’ve only been to this club twice. This is the plushest and most expensive club in LA, and the only one that has valet parking. It caters predominantly to affluent Asian men. Unlike the other downtown clubs, you don't select the girls. When a group of customers comes in (they usually come in small groups, although don't feel shy about going by yourself), there are a couple of "mama-sans" wandering around who will go and pick girls to go over to their table. The girls sit behind a glass partition that allows you to see them, but they can't see you. If you see a girl you like, call one of the mama-sans over and tell her which girl you want. Most of the girls are attractive. Like most of the other clubs, Latinas are dominant but there are plenty to pick from if you like Asian or white.

I understand that now the mama-san will bring you a bill as in a restaurant, so you no longer go to the cashier to clock out. The waiter’s tip is included in the bill. You’re expected to tip the mama-san separately ($5). If you go there pay careful attention to the time you clock in with a hostess, as the club has been known to "inflate" the clock time.

The setup in the main room is more like a restaurant, with several leather booths. It’s very dark in this area, but its also pretty open so about the only thing that’s available is some discreet manipulation. There is a couch area on the other side of the bar where you may be able to do some feeding and groping. You have to watch out for the waiters coming through, though.

I've met several girls who used to work there who've told me they quit because management, shall we say, strongly encourages the girls to "date" the customers, if you get my drift.  Girls who don’t go along find that they get seated (with customers) less.

Danceland

1324 S. Figueroa Street., Suite 100, Downtown LA
Exit 110 S. Fwy at Adams, left on 23rd, left on Figueroa, right on Cameron
(213) 745-6076
Sun - Sat: 12pm - 2am
Cover: $3 after 9pm (VISA, MC)
Dance fee:
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Closed: 2003

I don't care for Danceland that much myself (the place is a dump). This used to be the Mecca for mileage, including boinking on the dance floor during the day shift (12:30-6:30), ever since Dreamland (now defunct) installed cameras. This is the only club besides Nine Zero Seven that opens that early.

Things have changed drastically since they were raided back in April of 1999. Now all rules, such as both of the hostess’ feet must be on the floor at all times, are strictly enforced and the place has been a virtual ghost town ever since. The raid also had a ripple effect on the other clubs, although I think it was more a case of Danceland being singled out for special attention rather than part of a general crackdown on the clubs.

El Gaucho

425 W. 8th Street, Downtown LA
Exit 110 N. Fwy at 9th, left on Broadway, left on 8th
(213) 623-4607
Sun - Sat: ?pm - 2am
Cover: ? (No credit cards accepted)
Dance fee:
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This is the bottom of the barrel. It’s a small club with only two or three girls on the entire roster worth seeing. I hear mileage is good.

Galaxy Ballroom

902 S. Olive Street, Downtown LA
Exit 110 N. Fwy at 9th, right on S. Broadway
(213) 489-2944
Sun - Sat: 7pm - 2am
Cover: $5 after 8pm (No credit cards accepted)
Dance fee:
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I have only been here a couple of times. They have a lot of girls, including several of the barely 18 types, but only a handful that I found appealing. There did not appear to be a lot of good freaking real estate.

Las Palmas Ballroom

950 S. Broadway, Downtown LA
Exit 110 N. Fwy at 9th, right on S. Broadway
(213) 623-4408
Sun - Sat: 6:30pm - 2am
Cover: $5 after 8pm (No credit cards accepted)
Dance fee: $27/hr
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Real window of opportunity for mileage is 6:30 PM until about 8:00 PM (maybe a little longer on Monday/Tuesday). You will be searched (with a wand metal detector) at the door. The main (first) floor is for non-dancing patrons and where the girls not dancing stand around. The club has a mezzanine that overlooks the main floor, a second floor and a third floor. All of these areas offer lots of places to hide. There are no cameras. The guards rarely if ever come up from the main floor. Your only concern is keeping the waitress from sneaking up on you. You can usually solve this problem by getting your drinks on the main floor and then telling the waitress that you have a drink and will not need any more service. The action is on the couches. A sign on the wall downstairs indicates the various types of music they play, but most of it is that "dance around your hat music." Many of the girls speak very little English, but everyone understands "dinero."

The girls at this club work 95% for minutes only. That is what I mean by dance intensive. They get a share of the dance fee, either $10 an hour or half the fee. I think the same applies to the other Latino clubs, with the exception of LA Grand and Tropical. There the girls do expect a tip. A club owner told me a story of how he once tried to tip a girl $20 at Danceland but she asked him if he would buy another hour of dance time instead. He told me the clubs have the girls "brainwashed" into emphasizing the accumulation of dance minutes.

If you find a girl that does something extra of course tip her; but if all she does is grind or let you grab a little there is no need. Their regular Latino customers do that anyway without tipping. These guys typically keep girls several hours, do what they can, and don't tip. It is the way it works in this club; the girls are basically working for minutes only.

I heard that many veterans were very pissed about the way prices skyrocketed after the (pre-raid) newbie invasion at Danceland. So what, you say?   It used to be that you could strike up a conversation with them (since you would be one of the few other English speaking patrons in the club), get to know them a bit, and exchange inside information with them. Now, many of them are reluctant to share information with newbies; they blame them for overpaying and making the girls overly greedy, which they feel resulted in vice being able to easily catch girls willing to do extra.

If you keep a girl 2 hours she is not expecting a $40 tip. She is happy to have made the 120 minutes. If you get a girl who provides extras be reasonable with your tip. $10 here is good, $20 makes you a king! Live by these rules and you will find that: 1) you can have a good time there, 2) the girls will like you, 3) the club will not attract unwanted heat from LE, and 4) some of the veterans will lose the chip on their shoulders and start sharing their inside info with you.

LA Grand

1040 S. Grand Avenue, Downtown LA
Exit 110 N. Fwy at 9th, right on Flower, left on Olympic, right on S. Grand
(213) 746-9200
Sun - Sat: 4pm - 2am
Cover: $5 after 7pm (VISA, MC)
Dance fee: $27/hr with 10 minute minimum
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There is now a rear as well as front entrance, and there is free parking in the rear (on the corner of Olympic and Olive).

This club is not to be confused with the Grand Avenue Club, the regular dance club formerly known as The Shark Club, just a few doors up the street. This is perhaps the only Latino club aside from Tropical that I can recommend -- not because the action is so good (it seems to go in cycles), but because if you’re a gringo you’ll be less likely to feel out of place here than the other Latino clubs (Tropical also being an exception). They have a high percentage of non-Latino customers, primarily Asians and blacks with a sprinkling of gringos.

This is just about the only Latino club besides Tropical where you will find girls of other ethnicities. The reason for this is management can’t seem to make up their mind if they want it to be a traditional, dance intensive Latino club or a more tip intensive, moderate mileage club like Flamingo used to be (see discussion under Las Palmas above).

A word of caution regarding mileage: it’s available, but you should be prepared to lower your standards considerably. The quality of the girls pales in comparison to Fantasy, e.g., there are a lot of “porkers.” Sure you can find a few gems, but they are few and far between. I heard some of the girls who used to work there derisively refer to it as “LA Grind,” as it is basically a grind factory (sort of a Latinized version of the old Flamingo, for those who remember that club).

Like most Latino clubs, the place appears designed to encourage you to dance, as there is no place to sit down except for the stools around the snack bar. There are two combination dance floor/couch areas. There is a large, enclosed dance floor in the main room just past the front counter at the top of the stairs. Just outside this room are a few couches, and there is an adjacent couch area that used to be the main dance floor. There is another large couch area with a smaller dance floor just to the right of the top of the stairs. This is also the TV room. The setup in this room is very similar to VIP (the owner of LA Grand is also part owner of VIP. There are cameras in both couch areas.

Nine Zero Seven Club

907 S. Hill Street, Downtown Los Angeles
Exit 110 S. Fwy at 9th, right on Hill
(213) 489-7620
Sun - Sat: 12pm - 2am
Cover: $5 after ?pm (VISA, MC)
Dance fee: One hour minimum charge on credit cards
Map

They alternate between slow and fast music every half-hour. During the slow music they turn they lights down real low on the dance floor. This is your window of opportunity for grinding or other freaking that may be available. As with all the other Latino clubs except LA Grand the couches are close together, which is not conducive to privacy.

Tropical Club

1721 So. Flower Street, Downtown Los Angeles
Exit 110 S. Fwy at Adams, left on 23rd, left on Figueroa, right on Venice, right on Flower
(213) 744-0477
Sun - Sat: 4pm - 2am
Cover: Free (VISA, MC)
Dance fee: $27/hr 10 minute minimum
Map

There is a banner advertising free parking on the chain link fence of the lot across the street, on the northeast corner of the intersection of Flower and 18th, right by the freeway on ramp.

This is a Latino club (at least that was the original intent) that apparently aspires to be an integrated club like Flamingo used to be. Upon approaching the entrance I was greeted by a security guard, who performed a pat-down search (strike one). A sign prominently displayed outside the entrance listed all the items that were prohibited:
No sneakers?!?!
No tank tops
No ball caps
No shorts
No T-shirts
No bandanas
No gang attire
No weapons (duh!)

Those are the ones that I remember off the top of my head. The list had at least 9 or 10 items.

The entrance is downstairs. You first enter a small, bare foyer area, which also serves as the designated smoking area. There may have been an elevator there; I don’t recall as I took the stairs. Up the stairs to the right the first thing you see is a counter with a cash register and a soda machine behind it. I’m not sure what the purpose of the counter, which was manned by a club staff member, is since the “main” cash register (at least the one where money was being collected) is further inside the club.

To the left of the top of the stairs around a wall are the bathrooms. The men’s room was larger than the one at CF, with both a regular and handicapped stall. With the exception of some debris on the floor, it was sparkling clean. On the same floor are two offices with interior windows. There was another windowless room that may have been a storeroom.

As you pass the counter to the right, a short corridor takes you into the main area of the club. At the end of the corridor to the right is the front desk. The DJ booth is inexplicably located right behind the front desk, which makes it pretty crowded when more than two people are in the area. Behind the front desk near the floor are four camera monitors (strike two). One was focused on the dance floor; another on the TV room, another on the poolroom, and the fourth featured alternating shots of various areas of the club.

The corridor opens up into a square shaped room with a shiny, hardwood floor and fake tropical plants ala LAG, VIP, and SH where the girls sit, both on couches in the middle of the room and along the wall to the left. There is also a short row of couches on the other side of the front desk where both customers and girls were sitting. On the far right is the snack bar. At the far end of the room is another room with two pool tables.

Opposite the front desk to the left is the entrance to the TV room. Actually it’s a double TV room, with a fairly sizeable main area and a smaller, secondary area behind it with its own TV separated by a short wall. There is a single file of couches running the length of the long, rectangular room along the near wall. Across the aisle against the far wall there is a double file of couches set end to end, like what you’d see at the Latino clubs like Las Palmas, Galaxy, and 907. The couches are new and of the cloth variety, with short backs. A leopard print carpet runs the length of the room. At the front of the room is another short wall with two files of couches. Just beyond the couches is the dance floor, which is slightly bigger than the one at CF. To the right is sort of a small “cutout” area, which is probably the best area for grinding. The TV room is only moderately dark and there didn’t appear to be any good nooks and crannies for freaking. Also, there was considerable traffic going through the area (strike three). The darkest area is where the couches just off the dance floor are. Maybe if you got there early, when no couples are on the floor, you might be able to do some freaking because the camera in that part of the club is aimed at the dance floor.

There were approximately 45 girls on hand on their grand opening night at 8:30 PM. The majority of them were Latinas and all were new faces to me. Some of them looked vaguely familiar, but I couldn’t place them. Overall, not a bad looking group, not as good as CF but definitely better than LAG.

Later, as I exited the club the owner thanked me for coming and asked if I had any recommendations for improving the club. He apologized for the frisk, saying that was only supposed to have been for the gangbanger types.

I wanted to say they needed to provide more privacy but in the interest of subtlety I just alluded to this by mentioning the doubled up couches in the TV room. Without mentioning him by name, the owner alluded to the fact that Bill, the owner of LAG, wasn’t involved with the club. He said “the other guy” didn’t want to spend any money to attract a higher-class clientele.

Recent reports indicate that, although the camera monitors below the cash register were turned off (they are still on in the office), the lighting has increased and that they are trying to keep couples off the more private part of the dance floor (there is a small area that isn’t picked up by the cameras). These moves are not conducive to increasing business.

The location is perfect for long-term survival since other than a low-income residential hotel, there is nothing nearby that may generate complaints. However, it appears that the owner is in some serious denial and "regret" over the basic facts of life regarding hostess clubs.

Based on what my source saw, they will be losing money until they accept reality and the girls and customers catch up with this realization. He counted six employees working (not counting maybe ten girls). That’s not enough business to support expenses, so the owner is losing money every night.

The question is will their desire to make money overcome their squeamishness over the true nature of the business. I think they will struggle unless they make some adjustments. However, I have also heard that the owner owns the building that the club is housed in, so it could be that the club is merely a tax write-off and not something that necessarily has to make money for him. Besides the foregoing, if you want to see why I gave this place a “thumbs down,” read the reviews by others in the Reader Review section of this site.